It started with a quote from an industry reviewer, regarding
my time travel series starting with Rowena Through the Wall. He said: “OUTLANDER meets SEX AND THE CITY.”
Nice way to describe Rowena et al. I’m very grateful to him. But of course, when I quoted him, I messed up the spelling of
Outlander.
So here’s a sneak preview of my next book:
OATLANDER
Claire (okay, lets change that to Flaire) falls through time
and lands in virtually the same country she did in that other book. The country that thinks using animal bladders
for instruments is a really neat idea.
“What the heck,” says Flaire, looking around at all the
sheep. “This isn’t Kansas.”
“Ach no,” says ruggedly handsome and unmarried oat farmer,
who might possibly be named Jamie (okay, let’s change that to –heck, nothing
rhymes. Tamie? Bamie?
Okay, Balmy. “And why are you
wearing just your slip, lass?”
Flaire (looking down): “Blast. So’s I am. Well, fuck-a-duck.”
Balmy: “Canna no dae
that, lass. Only sheep here.”
<We travel further along in the story, to the battle of
Culloden, where Balmy and the local rebels exchange words.>
Leader of Rebels:
“Today will go down in history, lads! Grab yer spikes and pitch forks! We go to spill English blood!”
Balmy: “Not on me oat field, ye don’t.”
“SCOTLAND! SCOTLAND! SCOTLAND!” Rebels charge.
Flaire, watching everyone trip over sheep. “This isn’t going to end well.”
Balmy: “Back to
Kansas, Lass?”
Flaire: “Sure. No oats though. We’d have to call this…Cornlander.
Balmy <scratching chin>: “But that would be-“
Flaire: “Corny?”
Melodie Campbell writes funny books. Mostly about crime. Or maybe her comedy is criminal. You be the judge.
On Amazon
I suspect Culloden resists comedy
ReplyDelete"Gulloven! Quick, lass, duck down or they'll crap all over ye!"
ReplyDeleteThanks for the laugh!
Which may be why they lost the battle, Janice :)
ReplyDeleteEve, you are a kindred spirit - grin.
ReplyDeleteYou're right - this is one of your zanier posts - but hilarious!! Thanks for the laugh on this gloomy day!
ReplyDelete